Saturday, April 5, 2008
It is hard, hard, hard. I go through so much back and forth. I want to soak myself in my kids energy and free spirited lives but at the same time I constantly look for escape. I try to "hide" from them around the house without even realizing it. "Do you want to watch a movie and have a snack?" Code for....Mommy is gonna shut you in the other room with everything you need for a few hours so I can space out and do nothing. I want to fully live my life but I am too tired most of the time. I really hate it. I hate depression and all the crap that those around me have to deal with because of it.